50 Things.

Hearing the words "you need open heart surgery" can be terrifying.
I tried to find things that made that fear less powerful. After all,
"Fear cannot take what you do not give it."

50 Ways I Made Open Heart Surgery Less Scary:

1. Googled "I'm 22 and getting open heart surgery". Relevant results: minimal.
2. Started a blog about my experience.
3. Found a few stories and blogs that had stories similar to my own.
4. Read journal articles. Because no reliable information ever comes from Yahoo Answers, guys.
5. Marveled at how much I was able to accomplish with a less-than-healthy heart.
6. High-fived myself for doing such cool things, all with a hole in my heart.
7. Watched YouTubes of other heart patients recovering from open heart surgery and thriving. (Don't search "sternotomy". Does not help with the whole "not scary" vibe.
8. Wrote a letter to myself.
9. Prayed for my doctors and nurses, even before I knew who they were.
10. Asked questions.



11. Found answers.
12. Learned everything I could about my heart and what was wrong. Knowledge is power.
13. Drew a "scar" down my chest with a pink Crayola marker to prepare myself for what I would look like.
14. Embraced life's HUGE curve balls.
15. Admitted (reluctantly) that I wasn't invincible.
16. Accepted that my post-grad plans were in no way going to resemble any of my friends'.
17. Relaxed...So much less pressure when you realize what you can and can't control
18. Smiled. Because it's worth it. (100 points for whoever catches the reference I'm making)
19. Texted my cardiologist with all my questions and concerns.
20. Stopped asking, "What if I can't do this" and started asking "What if I can?"


21. Prayed. A lot.
22. Cried. A lot.
23. Laughed. A lot.
24. Chugged a bunch of molasses (because allegedly it helps with upping your iron levels). I don't recommend this; it was gross.
25. Observed the doctors and nurses at PCH and familiarized myself with my surroundings.
26. Appreciated the little things, like the smell of grass and the chirping of birds at sunrise.
27. Comforted my family. Because open heart surgery doesn't just affect the patient.
28. Sang in the shower.
29. Danced. Because why not.
30. Thanked God for the beautiful life I have been given.


31. Downloaded tons of positive, inspirational music.
32. Talked about what I was feeling.
33. Shared my fears with my friends.
34. Made a list of things I wanted to do after surgery.
35. Hugged a lot of people.
36. Redefined what I meant for me to be strong (hint: it has nothing to do with doing everything on your own)
37. Received an Anointing of the Sick.
38. Gave people my address. Because flowers, cards and well-wishes go a long way. 
39. Took advantage of the opportunity to buy a new post-surgery wardrobe.
40. Ate whatever the heck I wanted to for my "Last Supper" (Thai Food).

41. Looked at everything in a different light the night before my surgery. 

42. Stared at the stars and the moon. Realized that they shine so much more brightly during the darkest of nights. 

43. Allowed myself to relax and go to bed the night before.

44. Relished my last night of laying comfortably in bed.

45. Brought my teddy bear with me to the hospital.

46. Took pictures because I knew this was a journey I wanted to remember. 

47. Enjoyed my time with my family before being wheeled into the operating room

48. Joked with my surgeons and nurses while I was laying on the operating table (Anesthesiologist

was an ND grad & she lived in PW, my rival dorm...sassiness ensued). 

49. Breathed a huge (but painful) sigh of relief when I woke up. 

50. Fist-bumped my nurse. Because duh. 

Any other advice for future patients (heart surgery or otherwise)?

I'd love to hear your ideas!