Which one of these is not like the other ones?

My surgery is being performed at one of The Coolest Places Ever: The Phoenix Children's Hospital.

Why, might you ask, is a 22-year-old being treated at a children's hospital? Friends, I have asked myself the same question. Technically, I am old enough to have a child of my own, and the receptionists and scheduling staff have made that quite clear. When I called on the phone to make an appointment, they asked me for my child's name. Several times. 

Them: What is your child's name? 
Me: I am the patient.
Them: I'm sorry?
Me: I'm the patient. I'm the one with the heart problem. Also, I have no kids.
Them: *long pause* Ummm okay, sorry about that. Could you hold on one moment? *long pause again* .... okay sorry. What exactly, is your date of birth?

1990 has never seemed so long ago.

It also gets kind of weird when all of the patient pre-operating instructions are addressed to the parents of the young children. 

• "It may be helpful to bring your child's pacifier."
• "Your child is allowed to bring one stuffed animal into the operating room."
• "Child Life assistants supervise all playrooms, and plan crafts and other special activities."

My sister sarcastically told me that I'd make a bunch of new friends in the playrooms during my week-long stay. By friends she means 5-year-old heart patients who enjoy coloring books, Play-Doh and tea parties with imaginary talking animals. I think we might have more in common than my sister thinks.  

All joking aside, I'm actually really happy that I get to stay at Disneyland  Phoenix Children's. I know looks aren't everything, but this place is decked out in family-friendly, child-friendly, MayaJoy-friendly colors and designs. Example:

via. 

Jealous? I thought so. 

So, why am I actually staying at a children's hospital? Because of the advances in technology during the last few decades, it's becoming easier and easier to detect and treat congenital heart defects when the child is young. I flew under the radar for years, and so now I am a rare species (so hipster). Because most congenital heart defects are operated on when the patient is young, my surgeon operates mainly on kids and is based at a children's hospital. Thus, I have the great honor and privilege of being one of the oldest "children" at PCH.  

I'm incredibly excited.